"Running Deep" - screenplay by Derek Paterson.
This is an excerpt from a completed screenplay.
"Running Deep" - screenplay by Derek Paterson.
FADE IN:
EXT. PINK PUSSY NIGHTCLUB - 1930 - NIGHT
The coolest joint in town. A pink neon cat grins above the
entrance. Taxis drop off handsome GUYS and their gorgeous
GIRLFRIENDS.
A slick sportster ZOOMS along the street like a rocket and
SCREECHES to a stop in an empty space. JOHNNY NEVADA, 20s,
climbs out, straightens his tie, rolls his hat up his arm
and onto his head.
The Girls stare in awe. Their Guys scowl in irritation.
Johnny heads for the entrance and smiles at the Girls.
JOHNNY
Good evening, ladies.
INT. PINK PUSSY NIGHTCLUB - NIGHT
JOE SAX, 40s, opens the door for Johnny and grins.
JOE SAX
Well, well. If it isn't Mr. Johnny
Nevada himself.
JOHNNY
Joe Sax. Tell me you're playing
tonight?
JOE SAX
Sorry to disappoint you, we got a
band booked.
JOHNNY
They got you opening doors for a
living?
JOE SAX
Tips are good, I ain't complaining.
You here for the "other"
entertainment?
Johnny nods. Joe Sax indicates a roped-off doorway guarded
by a muscular GOON in a Tux.
Johnny gives his hat and coat to CLOAKROOM GIRL, a pretty 18-
year-old who can't keep her eyes off him. He winks at her,
she smiles shyly.
THELMA, 25, a strikingly beautiful cocktail waitress,
deliberately bumps into Johnny.
THELMA
Oh, excuse me. You look just like
someone I used to know. Only he
didn't wear hundred dollar suits and
drive a sportster.
JOHNNY
Thelma.
THELMA
You remember my name, I'm flattered.
JOHNNY
I got it tattooed across my heart.
That broken thing right here.
He taps a finger against his chest.
THELMA
Poor boy. Mama can mend Johnny's
broken heart. If he'll let her.
JOHNNY
What happened to that high roller
from Texas anyway?
THELMA
He blew all his money on the tables.
I never saw him again. So what about
it, Johnny?
JOHNNY
Got some business to take of.
THELMA
Then we'll talk?
JOHNNY
Yeah.
Thelma kisses her finger, touches it to Johnny's cheek. She
walks away, hips swaying. Johnny and Joe Sax watch her go.
JOE SAX
Some woman.
JOHNNY
A regular firecracker. Now, about
that entertainment...
JOE SAX
These boys play rough. You better
hold onto your wallet, that's all
I'm saying.
JOHNNY
Thanks for the warning, Joe Sax.
He heads for the guarded door.
INT. POKER ROOM - NIGHT
Five POKER PLAYERS sit around a table. DIAMOND JAKE DONOHOE,
40, has the biggest winnings pile. The Goon shows Johnny
in. Diamond Jake grins, revealing a gleaming diamond tooth.
DIAMOND JAKE
Is that Johnny Nevada I see, or is
it a ghost?
JOHNNY
Diamond Jake Donohoe. Some people
never change.
DIAMOND JAKE
Didn't know you were back in town.
JOHNNY
I been keeping my nose clean.
DIAMOND JAKE
A little birdie told me the Bingo
Brothers were looking for you.
JOHNNY
They found me.
Diamond Jake and the Players exchange wary glances.
JOHNNY
I hear you run a friendly game.
DIAMOND JAKE
A thousand bucks deals you in. If
that's your idea of friendly, take a
seat.
Johnny takes a seat, pulls out a leather wallet, shows his
lettuce. Diamond Jake nods approval.
JOHNNY
What are we playing?
DIAMOND JAKE
A little game called "poker."
JOHNNY
Poker. I think I heard of that.
Diamond Jake shuffles and offers the pack for Johnny to cut,
then he deals. His fingers blur, he's a magician, tossing
the cards into perfect arrays in front of everyone.
JOHNNY
I see you've been practicing.
DIAMOND JAKE
Dealer's in.
Everyone throws in a grand. Johnny's last, he checks his
cards, looks at each Player, then adds a grand to the pot.
JOHNNY
What happens now?
DIAMOND JAKE
You're cute, Nevada. Let's see how
you play with the big boys. I'm
taking her high. Five thousand.
Five big ones swell the pot. Johnny gives a low whistle.
Diamond Jake stares at each Player in turn, waiting. Five
grand goes in. Another five. And another. The next Player
folds, disgusted. The next Player bets five.
All eyes are on Johnny. He peeks at his cards and tut-tuts.
JOHNNY
I never did have any luck at cards.
Ah, what the hell.
He counts five grand, throws it in. Counts another ten,
throws it in too. They stare at him, bewildered.
JOHNNY
I'll, uh, raise you. Is that the
term?
DIAMOND JAKE
Yeah, that's the term.
Diamond Jake glances at the other Players. They grin. Looks
like they got themselves a sucker.
DISSOLVE TO:
Diamond Jake looks sourly at his depleted stash. Johnny's
stash is a mountain of green. There's a gold watch in there
too, and a sprinkling of silver dollars. The other Players
are wiped out but stay as interested spectators.
JOHNNY
Gimme one.
He throws down a card, Diamond Jake deals him a new card.
Johnny's eyes light up.
JOHNNY
Hey, how'd you know I needed this?
DIAMOND JAKE
A regular wiseguy.
Johnny pushes his entire stash into the middle of the table.
JOHNNY
I'm taking her high. If that's okay
with you.
DIAMOND JAKE
I haven't got that much.
JOHNNY
Well, what have you got?
Diamond Jake peeks at his cards, examining them one by one.
Four Kings and a Queen. The Queen winks at him!
Diamond Jake slowly reaches inside his jacket. The Players
lean back, expecting him to draw a gun. He pulls out papers
tied with a ribbon and throws them on the pot. "PINK PUSSY
NIGHTCLUB - TITLE DEEDS."
JOHNNY
You're sure?
DIAMOND JAKE
I feel it's my duty to give you a
game you'll remember for the rest of
your life.
JOHNNY
That's mighty kind of you, Diamond
Jake. You show me yours and I'll
show you mine.
Diamond Jake lays down his cards.
DIAMOND JAKE
Four smiling guys and one very happy
lady.
JOHNNY
Damn.
He stares at his cards, frowning.
JOHNNY
Damn.
Diamond Jake grins from ear to ear.
DIAMOND JAKE
Been a pleasure doing business with
you, Johnny Nevada.
JOHNNY
Damn. Four Kings...
He lays down his cards, one by one. Ace. Ace. Ace.
JOHNNY
I got me three Aces...
He lays down a Queen. She's about to burst into tears!
JOHNNY
And a Queen...
He turns over his last card.
JOHNNY
And another Ace...
His Queen smiles with joy!
Diamond Jake's eyes spin like roulette wheels. The Players
lean forward, unable to believe Johnny's hand.
JOHNNY
Sorry to disappoint you, Diamond
Jake.
Under the table, Diamond Jake's hand closes around a gun
hanging from a bent nail.
DIAMOND JAKE
Ya win some, ya lose some.
JOHNNY
I'm mighty impressed with your style,
Diamond Jake. Isn't every man who
could lose his nightclub and keep
his cool like you have. Dignity,
that's what I'm talking about. You
got dignity.
Diamond Jake brings up his gun.
DIAMOND JAKE
Screw dignity. Nobody takes the
Pink Pussy from Diamond Jake Donohoe.
BLAM! Diamond Jake clutches his bleeding hand.
Johnny stares at him over the smoking barrel of HIS gun.
JOHNNY
Why Diamond Jake. I never figured
you for a sore loser.
DIAMOND JAKE
Go to hell.
JOHNNY
Hush now. I'm gonna let you live,
Diamond Jake, because shooting an
unarmed man is uncool. But if I see
your face around here again, I won't
be so nice. Tell me you understand
what I'm saying.
Diamond Jake's jaw muscles ripple, he's fit to explode.
DIAMOND JAKE
I understand what you're saying.
Johnny jerks his head toward the door. Diamond Jake exits.
Johnny picks up the title deeds, examines them curiously,
slips them inside his jacket.
A modern phone RINGS.
JOHNNY
Somebody get that, will you?
No one moves. The phone keeps RINGING.
JOHNNY
Hey, I own the damn place, now will
somebody please answer the damn phone?
INT. LIVING ROOM - MARION'S APARTMENT - DAY
A modern uptown apartment, tastefully furnished. The same
phone RINGS insistently.
A book shelf contains a dozen romance novels with titles
like PASSION IN PARADISE, HIS THROBBING HEART, HER MAJESTY
COMMANDS. Each cover has an impossibly handsome man and a
beautiful passionate woman.
MARION BRIDGEPORT, 20s, male, his back to us, sits at a desk
typing on a laptop. The ringing PHONE rips apart his
concentration. He snatches the phone up. Marion is Johnny
Nevada!
MARION (into phone)
What? What? What?
INT. LEONARD'S OFFICE - DAY
The inner sanctum of a busy literary agent. Framed pictures
of book covers hanging on the walls, including those from
Marion's shelves. LEONARD, 50s, may have developed a receding
hairline but he's lost none of his youthful enthusiasm.
LEONARD (into phone)
Marion, my man. I thought I'd call
and ask how our next best seller is
coming along?
INTERCUT.
Marion hits a key--
INSERT LAPTOP SCREEN - his "JOHNNY NEVADA RETURNS" manuscript
is "Saved" - the window closes revealing another manuscript
in the background titled "SLAVE OF THE SULTAN"
MARION
It's on schedule, "Slave Of The
Sultan" is on schedule. I been
working on it all week.
LEONARD
Glad to hear it! Hey, you know what
happens this Wednesday?
MARION
Surprise me.
LEONARD
The Valentinos.
MARION
The Valentinos are coming over for
dinner? Watch out for Sonny, he'll
pop a cap in your head and smile
while he's doing it.
LEONARD
The Valentino Romance Awards.
MARION
I recognize the words, but not when
they go together like that. A proper
sentence must have a verb.
LEONARD
"Never Love A Sultan" has been
nonimated for Best Romance Novel.
And no, before you ask, I didn't
have anything to do with it.
MARION
Hey, I never been nominated for an
award before. That's great. Isn't
it?
LEONARD
I think so. The problem is... people
don't really know what you look like.
Leonard picks up a book. The front cover shows a handsome
guy in a turban embracing a blonde American beauty who tries
to push him away. The title is NEVER LOVE A SULTAN. The
back cover features a photo of a smiling homely blonde woman,
40s, who is billed as MARION BRIDGEPORT.
MARION
They've seen my photograph.
LEONARD
They've seen my wife's photograph,
airbrushed, with a blonde wig and
the eyes a different color. You do
realize you don't look like that,
don't you? This isn't some kind of
identity crisis?
MARION
Just call me Liz from now on.
LEONARD
This nomination thing's serious. It
could mean big money.
MARION
Then go, you'll enjoy it.
Leonard's SECRETARY sticks her head in and gives him a thumbs-
up. Leonard gets up and shrugs into his coat while still
talking on the phone.
LEONARD
Me and Sam and Willoughby were
discussing the situation...
MARION
What situation?
LEONARD
Maybe it's time your readers learned
who Marion Bridgeport really is.
Marion laughs. It starts out funny but develops into a maniac
laugh that needs therapy. Then Marion's deadly serious.
MARION
Are you out of your mind?
INT. HALLWAY OUTSIDE LEONARD'S OFFICE - DAY
Leonard exits his office, his Secretary hands him a briefcase.
LEONARD (into phone)
Actually it's not such a bad idea.
The demographics show there's no
longer any stigma attached to a man
writing romance novels.
INT. ELEVATOR DOORS - DAY
Leonard pushes a button and waits.
LEONARD (into phone)
In fact, women are attracted to male
writers who are able to get in touch
with their softer side, express their
emotions in feminine terms.
INTERCUT.
MARION
Leonard, this isn't funny. It's a
long way from being funny. We agreed
Liz would be me.
LEONARD
Sure we did, three years and twelve
novels ago. Now you're a bestselling
author. You have an army of devoted
fans who love your books and are
desperate to meet you in the flesh.
You know what, Marion? It's time
they did. Sam and Willoughby agree
with me.
BING! The elevator doors open, Leonard steps inside.
INT. LEONARD'S ELEVATOR - DAY
INTERCUT continues.
MARION
Sam's paid to agree with you.
Willoughby is senile, he talks to
his dog. And then there's you.
LEONARD
What about me?
MARION
Only a crazy guy would sign up a
twenty-five-year-old man to write
romance novels. What the hell were
you thinking of?
LEONARD
I recognize talent when I see it.
MARION
I'd call it a mid-life crisis.
LEONARD
A little bird tells me "Never Love A
Sultan" is a heavyweight contender.
Chances are it'll draw most votes.
MARION
I find that most gratifying, but
we're talking wild horses and a
straitjacket, you know what I'm
saying?
LEONARD
I can understand your reluctance--
MARION
Did I ever tell you about my high
school graduation?
Leonard closes his eyes and sighs.
LEONARD
Maybe once or twice.
Marion's anguished expression fades to--
EXT. HIGH SCHOOL GRADUATION - DAY
A younger Marion, wearing grad robes and hat, has the stage.
He tries to speak but the attempt becomes an agony of hissing
and clucking as if he's choking to death.
RISING LAUGHTER from the unseen audience as Marion dies a
death.
MARION (V.O.)
I s-s-stood up there on that stage
and I t-t-tried to make the words
come out, only they w-w-wouldn't.
Everybody laughed at me, Leonard.
They l-l-laughed at me.
INT. ELEVATOR - DAY
INTERCUT continues.
Marion wipes tears away.
LEONARD
That was a long time ago, Marion.
You've moved on. You're a man now.
Forget the past, it doesn't matter.
MARION
Yeah, you're right. I have moved
on.
INT. OFFICE BUILDING LOBBY - DAY
INTERCUT continues.
Leonard heads for the front door.
LEONARD
Then you'll come to the ceremony?
MARION
I'd sooner wade naked through a swamp
infested with penis-sucking leeches.
You understand what I'm saying,
Leonard? There is no way I'm going
to any awards ceremony.
EXT. OFFICE BUILDING - DAY
INTERCUT continues.
Leonard exits the building. A taxi's waiting for him.
LEONARD
Marion, you'll look good in a Tux.
MARION
Yeah, you think so? That's funny,
'cause I don't own one. HAH!
DING! The doorbell.
MARION
Hold on, someone's at the door.
He goes to the door, opens it. A DELIVERY MAN smiles at
Marion and presents a plastic-wrapped Tuxedo.
DELIVERY MAN
Special package for Mr. Bridgeport.
Marion's eyes widen in fear.
EXT. BUSY DINER - DAY
CHANTELLE, 20s, a girl-next-door beauty, pauses to look up
and down the street before she enters the diner.
INT. BUSY DINER - DAY
Sitting at a corner table, ED ROURKE, 50s, crumpled and
nervous, plays with an empty coffee cup. Looking around the
diner he sees Chantelle, and waves her over. She sits down.
ROURKE
You took your sweet time.
CHANTELLE
To tell the truth, Mr. Rourke, I
thought I was being followed.
Rourke gets up, drops a five on the table and is about to
leave but Chantelle grabs his arm.
CHANTELLE
No one was following me. I was just
imagining things, okay? Look, do
you want this story or don't you?
Rourke thinks about it... sits back down.
EXT. BUSY DINER - DAY
The world goes by...
EXT. DINER PARKING LOT - DAY
Rourke walks to his car, beeps it open.
FOOTSTEPS. Roarke spins round, afraid.
BIG PUNK and SKINNY PUNK grin at him. They mean business.
EXT. BACK STREET - DAY
A world away from Marion's apartment. THREE STREET PUNKS
and two GIRLS hang out, music blaring from their blaster.
They watch as KEVIN, 20s, arrives in a beat-up convertible.
Kevin hardly resembles his cousin Marion at all. He's loud,
flamboyant, flip and hip.
BONER watches with hooded eyes as Kevin parks and dismounts
with style.
Kevin's gaze is drawn to the beautiful DARLENE who sneers as
if he's something she found on her shoe. Kevin drags his
eyes off her and grins at Boner.
KEVIN
Boner, my man. Looking good.
Kevin offers his hand. Boner half-heartedly slaps palms.
BONER
I always feel good when I collect
money.
KEVIN
Excuse me? I believe I have till
Friday to settle up.
BONER
I thought today was Friday.
KEVIN
Today is Monday. We still got
Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and
then it's Friday. All those days in
between, you know?
BONER
You could always settle up now.
KEVIN
What do you want to embarrass me for
in front of the ladies? Right now,
at this moment, I don't happen to be
carrying five big ones in my pocket.
BONER
I'll accept a partial payment.
That'll reduce your interest.
KEVIN
Did you just say "interest"? I
thought you said "interest," I must
have been mistaken.
BONER
Interest happens when you can't settle
up on time.
KEVIN
Let's talk about interest after Friday
midnight. Only we won't have to,
because I intend to settle up before
then.
BONER
Heard you played cards last night.
KEVIN
Feathers had a friendly get-together
at his place, yeah.
BONER
Heard you're into Feathers for five
gees. That makes me ask, how is
that deadbeat gonna pay me what he
owes if he's also gotta pay Feathers.
KEVIN
Making money isn't my problem. You'll
get yours, Feathers will get his.
BONER
I'd like a show of good faith.
KEVIN
Isn't that a little unusual?
BONER
It's standard operating procedure,
when dealing with skunks who lay
their paws on my woman when they
think I'm not looking.
Kevin glances at Darlene. She smiles smugly.
KEVIN
Whoever told you that is lying.
BONER
I don't take kindly to some skunk
calling my woman a liar.
Kevin groans inwardly as Boner's boys take a step forward.
Pain is only a moment away.
KEVIN
(to Darlene)
What did you go tell him for? You
said you wanted me. You said I was
special.
Boner glares at Darlene.
DARLENE
Uh-uh, I didn't say that. Not to
him.
KEVIN
Did too.
(to Boner)
She said you were over and done.
That's the only reason I'd even think
about looking at Darlene. You think
I want the shit beat out of me? I
know better than to screw with you,
man. I'm dumb, but I'm not stupid.
BONER
I learned something, long ago.
KEVIN
What's that?
BONER
Can't trust a damn word comes out of
your lying mouth.
Boner's boys grab at Kevin but he zooms down the street like
an Olympic sprinter. In seconds he's just a blip on the
distant horizon. Boner's boys give up.
BONER
Looks like Kevin left his car as
down payment.
Everyone laughs. Darlene climbs into Kevin's convertible
and starts the engine. Her girlfriend gets in beside her
and they take it for a spin, burning rubber.
EXT. STREET CORNER - DAY
Kevin stops and bends over, hands on knees, gasping for
breath. Then he realizes--
KEVIN
My car! They got my car!
He stamps his feet and waves his arms in frustration. Curious
PASSERS-BY stare at this madman.
KEVIN
Hell are you looking at?
He kicks a streetsign, DUNK! Ow! He hops around, holding
his injured foot.
INT. KEVIN'S APARTMENT - DAY
An untidy mess. Kevin enters, slams the door, slumps down
on his couch. He picks up the TV remote and finds a sports
channel. Begins to chill out...
BANG! The noise makes him jump six feet into the air. Kevin
runs to the window, opens it, looks out.
EXT. ALLEYWAY BEHIND KEVIN'S APARTMENT BUILDING - DAY
A bunch of KIDS, all ages up to mid teens, look up at Kevin.
Their football hit the window, it's on his fire escape.
KEVIN
Wha'thefuck you think you're doing
kicking that damn ball off my window?
They don't answer. Kevin leans right out, picks up the ball
and throws it down the alleyway as far as he can. A kid
runs after it.
KEVIN
Better not happen again!
INT. KEVIN'S APARTMENT - DAY
Kevin returns to the couch. His phone rings. He picks up.
KEVIN (into phone)
Madame Fifi's Exotic Massage Parlor.
INT. MARION'S PENTHOUSE APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - DAY
Marion holds up the Tuxedo like it's going to bite him. He
lays it over the back of a chair.
MARION (into phone)
I need a favor.
INTERCUT.
KEVIN
Well, well. If it isn't Cousin
Snooty. Too good to talk to us poor
folks.
MARION
I'm talking to you now.
KEVIN
Tell me why I shouldn't hang up?
You treat me like I'm some kinda
leper. Never return my calls.
MARION
You keep leaving messages on my
answering machine. They start off
friendly and end up like creepy
stalker guy. "Give me a thousand
dollars or I'll cut you into little
pieces." You scare the shit out of
me.
KEVIN
So I need a little money from time
to time. If I can't ask my own
cousin, who can I ask?
MARION
It would help if you didn't call me
when you're spaced out.
KEVIN
"Spaced out"? Flower power is over.
Deal with it. Now what the hell do
you want?
MARION
I'm looking for somewhere to stay.
KEVIN
What's the matter, is your palace
too small for you? You got more
rooms than the Waldorf-Astoria.
MARION
That's a slight exaggeration. I
just want to crash at your place for
a couple of days.
KEVIN
To what do I owe this pleasure?
MARION
I miss playing Connect Four with
you. It's time we bonded again.
KEVIN
You mean like before you moved up in
the world and left me hanging around
in this dump.
MARION
Something like that.
KEVIN
What makes you think I'd ever want
to see your ugly face again?
MARION
All I'm asking is somewhere to sleep
and somewhere to plug in my laptop.
KEVIN
Your laptop?
MARION
You can't sell it. I need it for
work.
KEVIN
You still writing that sports column?
MARION
Yes I am.
Marion catches sight of "NEVER LOVE A SULTAN by MARION
BRIDGEPORT." He lays it face down so the name is hidden.
But the smiling woman's photograph is on the back cover with
"MARION BRIDGEPORT" visible. Marion grabs the book and slips
it under a cushion so Kevin can't "see" it.
KEVIN
How come I never see your name? I
tell the guys and they say they never
see your name either. You're earning
megabucks writing some sports column
and I've never read a single word.
MARION
Yes you have, only you didn't know
it. The editor said I should use a
nom de plume, on account of my...
KEVIN
...having a woman's name.
MARION
Marion is not a woman's name.
KEVIN
Come on, we both watched Happy Days.
So what's your non de plume?
MARION
"Staff Writer." Every time you see
something written "by a Staff Writer,"
that's me.
KEVIN
Uh-huh. A couple of days?
MARION
If you've got room.
Kevin stretches his legs out on the couch and looks around,
sizing up his apartment.
KEVIN
I might have... for the right price.
MARION
What would the right price be?
KEVIN
Well now, let's see what we've got
here. If you were just wanting a
change of scenery, you could have
booked into a hotel. But maybe you
don't want to use a hotel because
someone might come looking for you...
only you don't want them to find
you. How am I doing?
MARION
You're cold. You're so cold your
teeth are chattering.
KEVIN
We'll negotiate a package once you
get here.
MARION
A "package"?
KEVIN
You'll need clean sheets, right?
You'll also need food. That laptop
of yours will suck electricity like
an elephant sucks water.
MARION
It uses a trickle current adapter.
KEVIN
Current costs money and someone's
gotta pay the bills. When are you
coming?
MARION
Today. Now.
KEVIN
See, I'll have to tidy the place up.
Get everything ready for you. I
asked some friends over for dinner
tonight, now I'll have to cancel and
make other arrangements.
MARION
You don't have any friends. All you
have is family, and they can't stand
you.
KEVIN
Thank you, you're too kind.
MARION
Remind me what your apartment number
is.
KEVIN
2-C. Actually it's the door without
any number on it. It kinda fell
off.
MARION
I'm happy you still have a door. I
assume it has a lock?
KEVIN
Shit, you want a lock, too? Is there
no end to your insatiable demands?
A lock costs extra.
DISSOLVE TO:
INT. MARION'S PENTHOUSE APARTMENT - BEDROOM - DAY
Marion grabs clothes from drawers and wardrobes and throws
them into a suitcase and carryall.
INT. MARION'S PENTHOUSE APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - DAY
The PHONE rings.
INT. MARION'S PENTHOUSE APARTMENT - BEDROOM - DAY
Marion hears the ringing phone and goes to answer.
INT. MARION'S PENTHOUSE APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - DAY
Just as Marion's about to pick up, the answering machine
kicks in and Marion hears his own voice.
MARION (FILTERED)
Hi, leave a message and I'll get
back to you soon.
LEONARD (FILTERED)
Marion, it's Leonard. I just wanted
to talk about the Valentinos. If
you're there, pick up.
(pause)
I know you're there, Marion. There's
nothing to be nervous about, I swear
to God. Look, I'm coming up. We'll
smooth out any worries you might
have. Okay?
Marion's eyes widen in horror!
EXT. MARION'S APARTMENT BUILDING - DAY
A taxi pulls up and Leonard gets out. He pays the driver
and enters the building. The Doorman smiles and holds the
door for him. The Doorman is "Joe Sax" in Marion's novel.
INT. HALLWAY OUTSIDE MARION'S APARTMENT - DAY
Marion exits with his bags and his laptop shoulder bag. He
locks his door and heads for the elevator.
INT. ELEVATOR - DAY
Leonard's on his way up. He watches the numbers change.
INT. HALLWAY AT ELEVATOR DOORS - DAY
Marion presses a button and waits. A SWEET OLD WOMAN, 70s,
joins him. Marion smiles at her. She looks him up and down,
not quite sure if she approves. Then looks at his bags.
SWEET OLD WOMAN
Going somewhere?
MARION
To visit my cousin.
SWEET OLD WOMAN
Where does he live?
MARION
Beverly Hills. He owns a mansion.
SWEET OLD WOMAN
A large mansion?
MARION
Twenty bedrooms and an Olympic size
pool.
SWEET OLD WOMAN
Color me impressed.
BING! The elevator arrives. Just at that moment, the Sweet
Old Woman drops her purse.
INT. ELEVATOR - DAY
The elevator doors open and Leonard steps out...
INT. HALLWAY AT ELEVATOR DOORS - DAY
...Just as Marion bends over to pick up the Sweet Old Woman's
purse. Leonard walks past without recognizing Marion's butt.
Marion straightens and gives the Sweet Old Woman her purse.
She suspiciously checks he hasn't taken anything, then steps
into the elevator. Marion does a double take on Leonard's
retreating back, then steps quickly into the elevator.
INT. ELEVATOR - DAY
Marion presses the button. The doors slide shut. He sighs
with relief.
SWEET OLD WOMAN
Thank you. Did you know there's a
sports writer lives along that end
of the hallway?
MARION
I heard that too.
EXT. MARION'S APARTMENT BUILDING - DAY
Marion exits ahead of the Sweet Old Woman. The Doorman hails
him a cab. The Sweet Old Woman exits the building. As soon
as the taxi pulls up, the Sweet Old Woman shoulders past
Marion and climbs aboard. The taxi moves off.
The Doorman shakes his head and hails another cab. When it
arrives he opens the door for Marion.
DOORMAN
You gotta hit 'em low. Their sense
of balance goes at that age. One
knock and they're over.
Marion slips him some green.
MARION
Now that advice is worth paying for.
Anyone asks, you didn't see me.
DOORMAN
You got it.
INT. TAXI (MOVING) - DAY
Marion looks back as the taxi pulls away. Leonard exits the
building in a hurry and talks to the Doorman. The Doorman
shrugs and spreads his hands. Marion grins. He made it.
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. ALLEYWAY (KEVIN'S APARTMENT BUILDING) - DAY
Marion's taxi pulls up. He gets out and pays, the taxi drives
away. The football kids stop playing and stare at him.
Marion stares back. A Mexican stand off.
The kids are distracted by Chantelle's arrival. They rush
to greet her like she's everyone's big sister. Marion can
hardly see her for the press of bodies.
MIKEY
Aw c'mon, Chantelle. Just once!
THE OTHER KIDS
C'mon, Chantelle! C'mon!
Chantelle puts down her coat and bag and catches the football.
The kids move back... and Marion gets his first good look at
her. She's a dream in tight blue jeans and a University
sweatshirt.
CHANTELLE
Go deep, Mikey!
Mikey runs down the alleyway, glancing back over his shoulder.
Marion wonders when Mikey's gonna stop. The other kids are
expecting something to happen. Marion isn't sure what, but
he wants to wait and see.
Chantelle tosses the ball from hand to hand... looks at
Mikey... and KICKS the ball so high there's a danger she'll
bring down low-flying airplanes.
The ball sails through the air in a perfect arc and lands
right in Mikey's hands at the far end of the alleyway.
Mikey holds the ball up while the other kids cheer. Marion
puts down his bags and applauds softly. Chantelle wonders
who he is. Marion snatches up his bags and hurries inside.
INT. HALLWAY OUTSIDE KEVIN'S APARTMENT - DAY
Marion searches for the door without a number... and finds
it. He knocks. Kevin opens the door.
KEVIN
Yes, can I help you?
MARION
What is that smell?
KEVIN
Must be coming from downstairs.
MARION
It's coming from in here.
KEVIN
Can't be, I flushed the toilet.
What did you bring with you?
MARION
Just my toothbrush and a change of
clothes.
KEVIN
Looks like you got some excess
baggage. That costs extra, you know?
MARION
Look, I can find somewhere else.
Kevin takes Marion's suitcase and carryall.
KEVIN
Not like this. C'mon, I won't hassle
you. I'm out most of the day and
most nights, too. You'll have the
place all to yourself.
INT. KEVIN'S APARTMENT - DAY
Kevin shows Marion in, dumps his bags on a chair.
MARION
You got a job?
KEVIN
Of sorts.
MARION
You haven't got a job.
KEVIN
If a job is defined as pursuing an
endeavor that brings money home,
then yes, I have a job.
MARION
You don't fly down to South America
and bring back teddy bears loaded
with cocaine, do you?
KEVIN
What do you take me for? I only
carry stuffed donkeys through Customs,
I won't have nothing to do with that
teddy bear endangered species shit.
(beat)
Hey, you know what? It's good to
see you, even if you are Cousin
Snooty.
Kevin takes a half-step toward Marion and opens his arms as
if he's going to hug him -- but changes his mind and runs
his fingers through his hair instead.
MARION
Were you going to hug me?
KEVIN
Yeah, right!
MARION
You were going to hug me.
KEVIN
No way, this ain't no gay bar. You
better remember that.
MARION
Where can I set up my laptop?
KEVIN
What's wrong with having it on your
lap?
MARION
I have this sperm conservation thing
going on. I hope to find a use for
my boys one day.
KEVIN
When are you ever going to find a
girl who meets your impossible
standards?
MARION
I don't have impossible standards.
How do you know I haven't found her
already?
KEVIN
I'm going to go out on a limb here
and bet my major body organs you're
still single. Do I call the hospital,
or am I right?
MARION
I don't have impossible standards.
KEVIN
You're an impossible person, of course
you have impossible standards. I'll
move the table over to the window.
You're not going to start writing
right now, are you?
MARION
Well, maybe not right now, no...
KEVIN
Beer and pizza. I'm buying.
MARION
Sounds good.
KEVIN
We'll watch some football and chill.
MARION
Okay.
KEVIN
You don't sound too sure about that.
You remember how to chill, don't
you?
MARION
I draw the line at farting contests.
KEVIN
Aw c'mon, beer and pizza, where's
the fun if you can't release a little
gas?
MARION
I'd like to see my room.
KEVIN
You're standing in it.
MARION
So I have to sleep in the room where
you plan on making your contribution
to the destruction of the ozone layer.
KEVIN
Bedroom's available for a price.
MARION
Does the price include those clean
sheets we talked about?
KEVIN
No, they're extra.
EXT. KEVIN'S APARTMENT BUILDING - DAY/NIGHT
Day turns into night.
INT. KEVIN'S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Empty beer cans and pizza boxes everywhere. Kevin lies on
the couch sleeping it off. The TV but the sound's turned
down.
Marion sits at the window, his laptop set up on a table. He
types, intent on what's on the screen.
INT. PINK PUSSY CLUB - NIGHT
Johnny enters and deposits his hat and coat. Inside, Joe
Sax plays cool jazz, the numerous CUSTOMERS dig it.
CLOAKROOM GIRL
Hey, Johnny. Some guy was asking
about you.
JOHNNY
What guy?
CLOAKROOM GIRL
You'll know him when you see him.
He didn't look too happy. You been
fooling around with somebody's girl,
Johnny? That kind of thing can get
a man into trouble.
JOHNNY
That kind of talk can get a girl
into trouble, know what I mean?
CLOAKROOM GIRL
Any time you want to get me into
trouble, Johnny, I'm available.
She means it. Johnny smiles and goes on in.
INT. PINK PUSSY COCKTAIL BAR - NIGHT
Johnny enjoys the music for a moment, then looks around the
club's smoky interior. He sees a brute of a man, TYRONE,
occupying a booth in the company of Chantelle who has a Ginger
Rogers makeover.
INT. KEVIN'S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Marion stops typing and stares at the screen, puzzled.
EXT. ALLEYWAY - DAY (FLASHBACK)
In slow motion. Chantelle tosses the ball from hand to hand,
then kicks it into orbit. Her tight blue jeans are stretched
to their physical limits across her perfect butt.
INT. KEVIN'S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Marion shakes himself out of it. He glances guiltily at
Kevin but he's still asleep. He starts typing again.
INT. COCKTAIL CLUB - NIGHT
Thelma steps up to Johnny and runs her finger along his jaw.
THELMA
Hi handsome. Glad you could make it
tonight.
JOHNNY
Thelma...
THELMA
Thelma what? Thelma you're looking
lovely? Thelma I think about you
all the time? Thelma I decided I
want you back?
JOHNNY
You know how I feel about management
consorting with employees.
Thelma steps away but she's still smiling.
THELMA
We'll just have to see about that.
She heads for the bar, swaying seductively and looking back
at Johnny over her shoulder. The BARTENDER takes her order.
Tyrone notices Johnny and gets up. Chantelle touches his
arm, talks to him, asks him to sit down. Tyrone shakes her
off and lumbers toward Johnny -- but stops when Johnny holds
up a hand.
JOHNNY
Please. Not in here. You'll ruin
the ambience.
TYRONE
I'll ruin your damn face.
JOHNNY
I don't want no trouble.
TYRONE
That's too bad 'cause that's what
you got.
Tyrone swings a titanic punch but Johnny ducks and delivers
a solid body shot. Tyrone staggers back, winded. He charges
at Johnny like a rogue bull. Johnny sidesteps and hits Tyrone
with a one-two-three that sends the big guy crashing headlong
into the bar.
Tyrone slides to the floor, stunned. The Bartender peers
over the counter, shakes his head and goes back to pouring
drinks for Thelma.
Chantelle rushes to help Tyrone but Johnny catches her gently.
JOHNNY
Whoa there, not so fast.
CHANTELLE
Oh my God you've killed him!
JOHNNY
Relax, he's just taking a nap. Who
is he anyway?
CHANTELLE
You don't know?
JOHNNY
I always remember guys that big.
He inspects her face. Chantelle sports a black eye.
JOHNNY
He did that to you?
CHANTELLE
I deserved it. Me and my big mouth.
Behind Johnny, Tyrone slowly gets to his feet. His eyes
come into focus and he sees Johnny and Chantelle together.
Tyrone sees red. He "paws" the ground with his foot.
Chantelle's eyes widen in panic.
JOHNNY
I don't think there's anything wrong
with your mouth. It's not too big,
it's not too small. In fact...
Tyrone stamps toward Johnny, out for blood.
JOHNNY
Excuse me...
He turns and his punch comes up all the way from the floor,
catches Tyrone under the jaw. Tyrone hits the floor, out
for the count. Johnny straightens his tie, then turns back
to Chantelle who is in awe of him.
JOHNNY
...if you ask me, your mouth is just
perfect.
He kisses her. Chantelle melts into his arms. That's
Thelma's cue to step in. She pushes Chantelle back and sneers
at her, then grabs hold of Johnny and kisses him hard. It
goes on for a count of ten.
Chantelle watches, amazed, as Johnny's cheeks implode and
his eyes roll toward the ceiling. At last Thelma lets go.
Johnny gasps for air, grabs onto a bar stool, sits down.
JOHNNY
Pardon me. I always get dizzy when
someone sucks all the air out of my
lungs.
THELMA
(to Chantelle)
And that, little girl, is how you
kiss a real man.
CHANTELLE
And this...
Chantelle's roundhouse punch catches Thelma on the jaw and
spins her around. Thelma lands on top of Tyrone, both of
them out for the count.
CHANTELLE
...is how you punch out a bitch.
JOHNNY
Impressive. Do you box
professionally?
CHANTELLE
No, but Tyrone does. I can't believe
you knocked him out.
JOHNNY
Any idea why he looked me up?
CHANTELLE
He just told me we were coming to
the Pink Pussy tonight. He didn't
say why.
JOHNNY
Do you know who he works for?
CHANTELLE
Uh-uh. I guess you must think I'm
pretty stupid.
JOHNNY
I think you're pretty, but I don't
think you're stupid. Now where were
we before we were so rudely
interrupted?
They resume their kiss. Slow and intimate. And disturbed
by the sound of loud SNORING.
INT. KEVIN'S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Kevin snores like a pig, mouth wide open.
MARION
Hey! Pig Man! Shut up, you damn
animal!
Kevin snores louder. Marion gives up. He collects the beer
cans and empty pizza boxes, stuffs them into a garbage bag.
He finds a sock behind the couch and holds it between thumb
and forefinger, takes a sniff. He wrinkles his nose. It
goes into the bag too.
Kevin farts in his sleep. Marion exits, shaking his head in
disgust.
EXT. ALLEYWAY BEHIND KEVIN'S APARTMENT BUILDING - NIGHT
Marion's about to throw the bag into a super trash can when
he notices Big Punk and Skinny Punk struggling with Chantelle.
She tries to fight them off but it's a losing battle.
MARION
Hey! HEY!
He runs at them. Big Punk holds Chantelle while Skinny Punk
draws a switchblade.
Marion throws the bag into his face -- an explosion of pizza!
Skinny punk SCREAMS and claws at his cheese & tomato face.
Chantelle stamps on Big Punk's instep, he lets go of her and
hops painfully. Marion slips on a pizza box and spin-kicks
Big Punk in the guts, the breath whooshes out of Big Punk's
lungs.
MARION
I don't want no trouble.
Big Punk and Skinny Punk glance at each other, then run off
down the alleyway. Marion gapes in surprise.
CHANTELLE
Wow, that was fantastic! Are you
okay?
MARION
Yeah...
CHANTELLE
I think they were after my purse.
MARION
You should have let them have it.
CHANTELLE
Are you nuts?
MARION
I'd rather they took your purse than
harm you.
CHANTELLE
Well, when you put it like that...
Thank you. I've never been rescued
before. You were incredibly brave.
Was that karate?
MARION
It was a fusion of martial arts.
CHANTELLE
Wow. I saw you today. You stay
here?
MARION
I'm staying with my cousin in 2-C.
CHANTELLE
That would be the guy who hits on me
every day. I live in 2-B. We're
neighbors.
She offers her hand. Marion takes it.
CHANTELLE
Chantelle Parker.
After a moment's hesitation...
MARION
...Johnny Nevada.
As soon as he says it he feels like a dork.
CHANTELLE
Pleased to meet you, Johnny. Oh,
God...
Chantelle gets a little dizzy. Marion has to take hold of
her arm to steady her.
CHANTELLE
I feel terrible.
MARION
It's just the shock. Let me help
you inside. Lean on me.
She leans against him, her head on his shoulder. Marion
isn't turned on, but this is not an unpleasant situation.
CHANTELLE
Thank you...
07/05
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